I have to say this Christmas day was a lot more enjoyable then last year. At this time last year we were trying to divide our time between our kids at home and Bella who was 2 weeks old in the NICU. By this time in her short life we had already been told to prepare to let her go. We were still playing the minute by minute game and dreading every time the phone rang, worrying it would be the hospital with bad news. We were watching our little girl struggle for each breath.
Today was completely different. Bella is home and a whopping 11.8lbs. She is breathing good and trying to get better about eating. She smiled and played with the wrapping paper. We were able to gather all four of our children around the Christmas tree and enjoy being together as a family, no rushing to the hospital! We stayed in our pj's all day and munched on goodies. It was just how I wanted to spend the day, with my little family.
This last year has been hard for me and yet at the same time one of the most spiritual years of my life. Because of Bella, I have come to know my Savior in a way that I never probably would have without her. I learned more about what the Atonement means to me in my life. I have come to appreciate the gift Christ gave to each of us through His birth and His death and resurrection.
I still struggle with the "whys" sometimes. Why the early birth? Why the struggles to reach milestones? Why the cerebral palsy? Why the trouble gaining weight? Why her?
But then I remember that God knows Bella. He knows what she is capable of. He sees the eternal plan for Bella. He sees what we can learn from having her in our lives.
My goal for 2013 is to not ask why. But ask "What can I learn". I want to never miss an opportunity to revel in the miracle that Bella is. I want to rejoice every day in her smiles. I want to hold her close and help her become who God intended her to be. I want to help all my children reach their potential. To remind them, that they are great in the sight of God, and to their parents. I want to take each day to teach them about Christ and that through him all will be made right. Maybe not in our time but absolutely in His time.
I 2013 to be a year of service. I want to give back to all those who reached out to our family this last year. We have been so blessed to have good friends and family who love and support us. May we all have a blessed new year!!
Merry Christmas from Bella Grace and the rest of the Price clan!!
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Saturday, December 22, 2012
12-11-12 Happy 1st Birthday Bella Grace
Guess who is 1? Yes, our sweet Bella Grace has been with us for a year now.
We had a great day with our miracle. I can't believe it has been a year since she came into our lives (4 months early). I have learned so much in the last year. We have closer as a family. I have discovered things about myself that I wouldn't have if we hadn't been through everything this last year has brought our way. I have come closer to my Savoir and have learned more about the atonement that I probably wouldn't have learned any other way.
Bella had a wonderful day. She started it by hanging with our therapist, Missy. We tried cupcakes at therapy but Bella just gagged. Then we spent the day snuggling and thinking about the last year. I will be honest I cried some as the memories of the first few weeks of her life came pouring back. Then, we had a small party with family. Again, Bella wasn't too fond of the cake but loved her sucker.
We are so blessed to have her here with us. I am so thankful she got to stay on this earth. She has come so far and overcome so many odds. I won't lie and say it has been easy but she is so worth it! We look forward to every day with her and our other kids.
We had a great day with our miracle. I can't believe it has been a year since she came into our lives (4 months early). I have learned so much in the last year. We have closer as a family. I have discovered things about myself that I wouldn't have if we hadn't been through everything this last year has brought our way. I have come closer to my Savoir and have learned more about the atonement that I probably wouldn't have learned any other way.
Bella had a wonderful day. She started it by hanging with our therapist, Missy. We tried cupcakes at therapy but Bella just gagged. Then we spent the day snuggling and thinking about the last year. I will be honest I cried some as the memories of the first few weeks of her life came pouring back. Then, we had a small party with family. Again, Bella wasn't too fond of the cake but loved her sucker.
We are so blessed to have her here with us. I am so thankful she got to stay on this earth. She has come so far and overcome so many odds. I won't lie and say it has been easy but she is so worth it! We look forward to every day with her and our other kids.
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| See how far I've come......... |
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| Bella and her sucker |
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| Who needs a cake when you have a peppermint sucker? |
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| Mama and Bella snuggling on her birthday |
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| Spoiled with gifts and loves on her bday |
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| Rockin' her glasses |
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| Funny Bella with pigtails |
Bella Update
Can you believe it has been a year since precious Bella came into our lives, 4 months before she was suppose to? It has been quite a year full of ups and downs, but through it all I am reminded everyday of the miracle that lives at my house.
Bella in a nutshell:
Weight: 11lbs 8.5oz (it doesn't sound like much but when you start out at 1lb 9oz that isn't too shabby)
Height: 25 inches up from 12 inches at birth. Again, not too bad.
Head status: We go back to Salt Lake in January for a MRI. Depending on those results, Bella may be having surgery. At this point I am not sure if he would put in a shunt or redo the ETV (endoscopic third ventriculostomy). I am hoping it would be the ETV. Her right ventricle is still too large but some of that is because of the brain loss from the bleed spilling out of the ventricle when she was just a few days old.
Lungs: Bella is still on o2 at night. She is doing much better then we first anticipated. She is currently getting the Synagis shots (which helps her fight the RSV virus). We are hoping my summer time that she will have kicked her o2 habit all together.
Heart: Her PDA is completely closed. We have a follow up with her heart doctor sometime next fall.
Hips: We saw a pediatric ortho doctor last week and were given the good news that Bella's hips are developing just like the should. We worry about her hips and her spine because of her cerebral palsy (Bella has cp that affects all four limbs and her trunk. She is high tone or stiff in her arms and legs and weak in her abdomen and neck). We go back in a year for a recheck.
Eyes: Bella does have some significant eye problems. In the NICU she had ROP which has resolved. But she does have Cortical Vision Impairment (this is a neurological problem. Her brain can't interpret what her eye is seeing), hopefully this will get better with time. She also is suppose to wear glasses to correct her vision (but the little stink won't leave them on). The eye Doctor was hopeful that Bella would have fairly normal vision (with glasses of course) but he couldn't say if she would see well enough to drive....time will tell.
Tummy: Bella still isn't the best eater in the world. She is what they call a "low volume feeder". We have tried about every supplement in the book trying to get her to gain weight better. Currently we are adding formula to her breast milk but are hoping to switch to Pediasure. (She recently had a rash and we aren't sure if it was from her vaccines or from the Pediasure so we are giving it a couple days and then trying the Pediasure again). She is also on Mirilax in an effort to help her poo on a more regular basis.
Therapy: Bella is currently doing PT and OT. We love our therapist. She has made great progress with Bella. Bella will also be adding speech therapy to the list soon.
So now you have way too much information about our sweet miracle. Overall, she is doing well. We have come such a long way in a years time. It is still a rollercoaster that we can't get off of but I wouldn't trade my sweet Bella Bird for anything.
Bella in a nutshell:
Weight: 11lbs 8.5oz (it doesn't sound like much but when you start out at 1lb 9oz that isn't too shabby)
Height: 25 inches up from 12 inches at birth. Again, not too bad.
Head status: We go back to Salt Lake in January for a MRI. Depending on those results, Bella may be having surgery. At this point I am not sure if he would put in a shunt or redo the ETV (endoscopic third ventriculostomy). I am hoping it would be the ETV. Her right ventricle is still too large but some of that is because of the brain loss from the bleed spilling out of the ventricle when she was just a few days old.
Lungs: Bella is still on o2 at night. She is doing much better then we first anticipated. She is currently getting the Synagis shots (which helps her fight the RSV virus). We are hoping my summer time that she will have kicked her o2 habit all together.
Heart: Her PDA is completely closed. We have a follow up with her heart doctor sometime next fall.
Hips: We saw a pediatric ortho doctor last week and were given the good news that Bella's hips are developing just like the should. We worry about her hips and her spine because of her cerebral palsy (Bella has cp that affects all four limbs and her trunk. She is high tone or stiff in her arms and legs and weak in her abdomen and neck). We go back in a year for a recheck.
Eyes: Bella does have some significant eye problems. In the NICU she had ROP which has resolved. But she does have Cortical Vision Impairment (this is a neurological problem. Her brain can't interpret what her eye is seeing), hopefully this will get better with time. She also is suppose to wear glasses to correct her vision (but the little stink won't leave them on). The eye Doctor was hopeful that Bella would have fairly normal vision (with glasses of course) but he couldn't say if she would see well enough to drive....time will tell.
Tummy: Bella still isn't the best eater in the world. She is what they call a "low volume feeder". We have tried about every supplement in the book trying to get her to gain weight better. Currently we are adding formula to her breast milk but are hoping to switch to Pediasure. (She recently had a rash and we aren't sure if it was from her vaccines or from the Pediasure so we are giving it a couple days and then trying the Pediasure again). She is also on Mirilax in an effort to help her poo on a more regular basis.
Therapy: Bella is currently doing PT and OT. We love our therapist. She has made great progress with Bella. Bella will also be adding speech therapy to the list soon.
So now you have way too much information about our sweet miracle. Overall, she is doing well. We have come such a long way in a years time. It is still a rollercoaster that we can't get off of but I wouldn't trade my sweet Bella Bird for anything.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Update
Well, we celebrated Bella's first Thanksgiving. She tried the mashed potatoes...and gagged. It was a good day. As I snuggled with my kiddos and my sweet husband, I truly felt so blessed.
Bella continues to play the weight gain rollercoaster. We have a week of gaining followed by a few weeks of either losing or staying the same. Even though I try not to, I constantly obsess about her eating. Currently she is at 11 lbs 5 oz.
We did get her glasses. I wish I could say she loved them and wore them all the time. But...no. The little cutie doesn't like them at all. We can get her to wear them about 5 minutes if we are lucky. She has the uncanny ability to get those suckers off in a hurry.
Her head seems stable. I try not to think to much about it. But is like a nagging tooth ache that never really goes away. Every thing she isn't doing that she should be doing, I wonder if it is related to her head.
Therapy hasn't been real consistent the last month due to our being out of town and our therapist being gone. Therapy is a hard one for me these days. I am in constant turmoil if we are doing the best things to help Bella progress and rewire her little brain. I LOVE LOVE our therapist, I just always worry if we should be doing more or doing things different. I have been praying about it. I just want to feel the peace that only God can give. I have to have faith that He will direct in the path that is best for Bella and our family.
Bella was sick last week with a yucky nose. Thankfully her lungs are clear and her o2 levels are great. She is still on night time o2, I am hoping we can kick that after the RSV season.
We also had a huge event in our house last week....We said goodbye to Hellga. She was a loyal member of our family for the last year. She was reliable and very needed but her time with us came to an end. I will say it was bitter sweet and some tears were shed. But Hellga is gone...may she rest in peace. In case you are confused, Hellga was my breast pump. Yep, I am a free woman again. Bella is enjoying frozen milk these days.
Bella has a big day fast approaching next week. Can you believe that it has been almost a year since this little miracle came into our lives. What a blessing she has been. It has been quite a year for us, full of up and downs. Sometimes, I find myself getting caught up in all the things she isn't doing and obsessing about what we should do or should not do....and I was reminded by a fellow micro mom to slow down and not wish away this time with Bella. So my goal is to worry less. Enjoy the little things. Appreciate today. Give thanks for all the blessing that are mine. Find happiness. And like the little engine, I will say "I think I can.....I think I can"
Now, off to give sweet Bella a good morning kiss and get my kiddos off to school. May you have a wonderful day!!
Bella continues to play the weight gain rollercoaster. We have a week of gaining followed by a few weeks of either losing or staying the same. Even though I try not to, I constantly obsess about her eating. Currently she is at 11 lbs 5 oz.
We did get her glasses. I wish I could say she loved them and wore them all the time. But...no. The little cutie doesn't like them at all. We can get her to wear them about 5 minutes if we are lucky. She has the uncanny ability to get those suckers off in a hurry.
Her head seems stable. I try not to think to much about it. But is like a nagging tooth ache that never really goes away. Every thing she isn't doing that she should be doing, I wonder if it is related to her head.
Therapy hasn't been real consistent the last month due to our being out of town and our therapist being gone. Therapy is a hard one for me these days. I am in constant turmoil if we are doing the best things to help Bella progress and rewire her little brain. I LOVE LOVE our therapist, I just always worry if we should be doing more or doing things different. I have been praying about it. I just want to feel the peace that only God can give. I have to have faith that He will direct in the path that is best for Bella and our family.
Bella was sick last week with a yucky nose. Thankfully her lungs are clear and her o2 levels are great. She is still on night time o2, I am hoping we can kick that after the RSV season.
We also had a huge event in our house last week....We said goodbye to Hellga. She was a loyal member of our family for the last year. She was reliable and very needed but her time with us came to an end. I will say it was bitter sweet and some tears were shed. But Hellga is gone...may she rest in peace. In case you are confused, Hellga was my breast pump. Yep, I am a free woman again. Bella is enjoying frozen milk these days.
Bella has a big day fast approaching next week. Can you believe that it has been almost a year since this little miracle came into our lives. What a blessing she has been. It has been quite a year for us, full of up and downs. Sometimes, I find myself getting caught up in all the things she isn't doing and obsessing about what we should do or should not do....and I was reminded by a fellow micro mom to slow down and not wish away this time with Bella. So my goal is to worry less. Enjoy the little things. Appreciate today. Give thanks for all the blessing that are mine. Find happiness. And like the little engine, I will say "I think I can.....I think I can"
Now, off to give sweet Bella a good morning kiss and get my kiddos off to school. May you have a wonderful day!!
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